Identity Crises

A few weeks ago, I shared a prophecy of some things that the Lord had told me, mainly about my thumb sucking. But He also mentioned that I struggled with an identity crises. I've been thinking more about that statement, and I'm realizing it was still true, even though I knew certain facts. But I realize I'm not the only one, in fact most of the world struggles with an identity crises, including Christians and politicians. This is a huge problem, more than we realize. Let me try to explain the best I can.

When I was a young artist, I had so much confidence. I was good at it, even designing and building things too. Rarely was I afraid to try anything. Then I got married and had a daughter, and things got more complicated. I wanted to please my wife and daughter, to meet their expectations as a husband, lover and provider, as well as a father and as a "good" Christian role model. That didn't go as well as I had hoped, and I made a lot of mistakes.

Then Jesus stepped back into my life and things got even more complicated. How do I please God and my wife, daughter and family? This was even more challenging, and of course I had my own desires and expectations too. It wasn't working very well and I had more difficulty understanding who I really was.

Most men identify themselves by what they do, yet that's not who they really are—the same applies for women too. But, I no longer had an occupation or job, so who or what was I really? Then just over a year ago the Lord told me certain facts about my life, just as He had told Sheldon. However, knowing something and living it out on a daily bases was another thing, at least for me.

Watching Sheldon David has helped me a lot, especially these last few years. I saw more of what I want to become like. David has become so powerful and confident and in love with the Father, and that is what I want also. I just have not realized how badly I need Him. Having a revelation of the heavenly Father has really changed David's life, and I know it will also change mine.

The last few years, I have still wrestled with my flesh, along with certain doubts and fears. Those kinds of things have caused me to struggle with my true identity, even though I have also gotten to know the Father's heart a little better. My confidence would waver, and at times I still felt inadequate, but that was just the enemy messing with my brain.

One evening the Lord said, I was His friend and a few other facts as to who I was. Now, He wants to solidify them once and for all so I would not struggle my identity any more. We are heading for a new adventure—a road trip. A time where Father and son will really bond together.

I also love my earthly father, who is now in a rest home. He is kind, generous, and friendly and loves God. He also loved me, yet we really didn't have much of a real bonding even though he helped me many times. I don't blame him; he did the best he knew how; probably because that was the way he was raised. To me I thought this was normal, but I was wrong. However, I am very grateful for the role he had in my life.

A father should want to bond with his children; to share his feelings and teach them how to love and honor people as well as other spiritual principles that will sustain them for the rest of their lives. He needs to give them a vision for their future, of how he sees them. It's important that he blesses them and let know they are loved, as well as how proud he is of them. But most of all, to teach them the ways of God and how to have an intimate relationship with their heavenly Father. 

However, this rarely happens in families, and so the concept of a true fatherhood has been lost or distorted over the years. Yet, this is what it take to build true identity. Unfortunately, in many cases the father is no longer an influence or even in the picture. And so the world struggles with this father image and an identity crises. Most of us just live in ignorance not realizing how important this really is. If we really know our father, how will know who we are.

The same goes for our heavenly Father and how He sees us. Sure we can say I am His son or daughter, doctrinally. But, what does that all really mean or require of us? How do we live that out on a daily bases? This is where true faith and trust comes in. We're not just to talk to our heavenly Father, but we also need to hear and obey Him, and to know His plans for us. Then we know who we really are. 

Jesus knew who He was and His mission. He was bold and confident, yet kind and loving. Jesus also had no problems dealing with satan, people, religious guides or political leaders. Circumstances never bothered Him; whether it was a storm at sea or feeding a multitude of people. He just didn't worried about anything, because He knew His Father would supply all His needs. Jesus also spent time with his Father, learning the Father's heart and will each day, and then speaking and doing it. Jesus always knew His Father was pleased with Him, and where His power and authority came from. Jesus never had any doubt of who he was—the Son of God. There was no identity crises for Him. Jesus was also a prophet, priest and king, and guess what, so are we.

(to be continued)